My dad loved his present!!! He didn’t think I had made it at first because of how complicated/impressive it was. I was so worried about it so that made me feel fantastic. I did have to leave Monday night instead of this morning, partly because of weather and partly because I have a library event I’m excited for tonight and I didn’t want to be really tired for it.
I have had two public… incidents, shall we say, since we last spoke. That’s actually the reason I went for the autism article this month rather than the incredibly vulnerable one I was thinking of. Every time I get very distressed or very excited in public, I just can’t get it out of my head for days or even weeks. I always get stuck on the idea that adults aren’t supposed to behave the way I do. After I almost had a meltdown, my stutter became very intense and it still hasn’t settled back to its normal level. It has been several days. I am very frustrated by that, unsurprisingly.
In better news, I went to the library and got some books I’m really excited to read! I’ve also decided that, once the weather is more predictable, I’m going to use my savings for piano lessons. I can only afford a few months if I want to keep half of what I have—which I very much do—but if I don’t use my own money, it could be six months to multiple years before my parents can afford to send me to lessons. I’m hoping to start college in the fall so I’d really like to be able to have piano lessons before my schedule gets busy.
I painted my nails today, which is nice. I’m not especially good at it, considering my tremor and mediocre hand-eye coordination, but I enjoy having something fun and colorful on my body every day. I usually do alternating colors or one color per hand on most of my nails with an accent on the ring finger but I decided to just do a plain one color for each hand this time.
My dog slept in bed with me again on Sunday night. That was very lovely! He’s the sweetest dog in the world. I love him so much. I don’t really have much room in bed when he’s with me but I consider it worth it.
I’ll be honest, I’m struggling to think of more things to think about. I’m pretty tired because we didn’t get home until almost midnight. I did have pancakes for breakfast, though, and I love a good pancake. I had my favorite juice when I left but I forgot to finish it and now it’s spoiled. I’m very disappointed about that, but my mom said that we can see if we can get more. That specific juice is very hard to find, which I understand because it’s delicious, but there’s one store we can sometimes get it at.
I think I’ll leave today’s check-in here. My brain is foggier than usual today so I can’t form thoughts particularly well. On days like this, I’m basically on autopilot. I can’t really describe what that’s like but I guess if you know, you know.